"The Spy"
Written by Sir Ed Die
Directed by Sir Ed Die
Produced my Sir Ed Die
Special Thanks To:  The Spy Academy, Sir Ed Die
Rated PG-13

*Fade in, zoom out.  Camera pulls back to reveal 2fort5, in all it's
OpenGL-enhanced glory.  Zoom into the Blue sniper deck*

Snip:  Hey, have you seen anything lately?
Snipe:  No...  not for at least... ten seconds...
Snip:  Hey!  Here comes someone!
Snipe:  What is it?
Snip:  A soldi-

*Quickly zoom out to side view of the bunker.  A missle flies through
the bunker's "window".  Explosion, blood spills out the window, followed
by Snip's head*

Snipe:  Oh my god!  Snip!

*Another rocket.  Snipe's head rolls out of the bunker and towards the
camera.  Zoom out, then back, through the hallway, into the lobby, and
into the ramp room.  Zoom in on the HW Guy, Bubba, and the Demoman,
Mario*

Mario:  What was that-a?
Bubba:  I dunno.  Sounded like a rocket.
Mario:  I'll-a go and check-a!  *leaves.  Camera follows*

*Suddenly, the enemy Soldier dashes into the room, and fires a rocket at
Mario, which knocks him onto the floor of the ramp room*

Bubba:  Hey!  *charges his cannon*
Soldier:  Nice try!  *fires two rockets before Bubba can even get his
cannon charged, but the minigun does start, and the Soldier is knocked
back through the hallway.  Bubba tosses a Mirv to keep him back, and
runs into the resupply room*

*Move camera down to Flag Room, where Techy, the Engineer, and our hero,
Backstab the Spy*

Techy:  I coulda sworn I heard something upstairs.
Backstab:  Well, I'll go find out.  You make sure that Sentry Gun has
enough ammo.  Just in case.  *leave upstairs.  The camera remains with
Techy for a bit, as he watches Backstab go, then turns, and hits his gun
with his wrench for no apparent reason*

*Fade out.  Fade in at the lobby, where Bubba has just returned from the
resupply room, Mario is setting up pipe bombs, and DocGibs is hitting
Mario on the head with his healing axe*

Mario:  Did-a you get him?
Bubba:  Yep, I'm pretty sure.  He might still be out on that ledge, but
he's probably hurt.
DocGibs:  Someone had better check before Snip and Snipe go back there.

*The door from the resupply opens, and Snip and Snipe run out*

Snip:  Let's go!
DocGibs:  Wait a minute, guys!  The soldier's still-
Snipe:  Fine, my rifle's on autofire.  You happy?
Mario:  Let-a me go to-a!
Snip:  Fine.  Let's go!

*Out on the patio*

Soldier:  Come on...a little closer...

*Snip, Snipe, and Mario dash out, just as the soldier tosses a nail
grenade*

Mario:  There-a he is-a!
Soldier:  See you!  *fires a rocket at Mario, which hits him in the
shoulder, and throws him off the sniper deck.  [Yes, it will be a
running gag.  Live with it.]  Snip begins firing, while Snipe charges
his rifle*
Snipe:  Survive THIS!
Soldier:  Well, as much as I'd like to stay and chat, I have to leave.
*rocket jumps off of the roof, which knocks Snip and Snipe back a bit,
and lands in the water, laughing*
Snip:  NO!  *begins firing at the water, but doesn't hit anything*  That
bastard!

*Backstab runs up, nail gun readied*

Backstab:  Where is he?
Snipe:  He got away, into the water.
Backstab:  No, where's Mario?

*A groan from below.  The camera moves to Mario's view*

Mario:  Mumma me-a!
Backstab:  Uh...one of you guys call DocGibs...

*A little later, inside the Red Base, in the lobby*

Soldier:  I have returned, my liege.
Pyro:  Very good, Breaker.  Was the mission succesful?
Breaker:  No... I am not sure if they have a spy or not.
Pyro:  Fool!  *lowers the flame thrower at Breaker's chest.  He gulps*
I have others to complete this mission, anyways.  *pulls the trigger.
Flames course over Breaker, and he screams, and begins running around,
trying to put out the fires.  Finally, he screams a last time, and falls
over*
Breaker:  Master...Inferno...  *dies*
Inferno:  It is time for thos pathetic SMURFS to know their fate!  My
legions, gather here before me!  We shall conquer!!

*2 demos, another soldier, a medic, an hwguy, a scout, and an engineer
step in from the shadows/resupply/ramp room, and gather around their
leader.  Breaker, apparently restored to life, walks in, trembling*

Inferno:  Pipedream, Demolitious.
The 2 Demos:  Yes, master?
Inferno:  Cover Bioman and Overload  *indicates the Medic and Engineer*.

Pipedream and Demolitious:  Yes, sir.  *step in front of their charges*
Inferno:  BadBoy, you, Breaker, and Missle-d will lead.
HWguy, and the 2 soldiers:  Yes, sir.
Inferno:  Lastly, Scoutz, you will go in first, and distract the
guards.  Try and grab their Flag of Power, if you can.
Scoutz:  Yes, sir.
Inferno:  Let the games begin!!  *laughs evilly*

*The camera pulls back, through the hallway to the sniper deck, out of
the base, and into a full view of the Red Base as Scoutz runs out.  Fade
out.  Fade in on the Blue sniper deck*

Snip:  They're sending their Scout out.  Let's get 'im!
Snipe:  He's in my sights...  *fires*  Damn, I missed!
Snip:  He's strafing!  Is he allowed to do that?
Snipe:  I think so, but I'm not sure.
Snip:  Damn!  Switching to autofire!  *both snipers begin trying to
machinegun the agile Scoutz.  He jumps into the water and disappears
under the bridge*
Snipe:  Uh oh.  *pulls out a walky-talky*  Incoming scout, water
entrance!

*Inside the base*

Bubba:  We got a scout coming in!  Get ready!
Mario:  Right-a!  I got-a the pipe-a bombs in postion-a!
DocGibs:  ....Why do you talk like that?
Mario:  Like-a what-a?
DocGibs:  Like that.  With the -a after everything.
Mario:  I dunno-a!  I'm-a just-a Mario!
DocGibs:  *looks at Mario blankly*  You're wierd.
Bubba:  No dip?
Techy:  Shut up!  Here he comes!!

*Scoutz races in.  Techy's sentry fires up.  Scoutz dodges some of the
fire, but barely evades a missle.  Bubba's gun fires up, at the same
time Techy fires his railgun and DocGibs starts his Super Nail Gun.
Scoutz stops for a second, assesses his options, and turns around*

Bubba:  Chicken!!

*Scoutz runs back in, and chucks a flash grenade up at the group.  It
fires just as Backstab walks in.  He sighs.  Suddenly, the walky talky
crackles to life*

Snipe: *via walky talky*  We have a MAJOR Red force moving in, guys!
Backstab:  Shit, we just got hit with a flash grenade up here!  We don't
have time to prepare!  What's it consist of??
Snipe:  A HWguy, 2 soldiers, 2 demos, a medic, an engineer, and a pyro.
The pyro's keeping in back, for some reason.
Backstab:  Inferno.

*Fade to white.  Flashback sequence*

Inferno:  Ah, I caught you sneaking around here!  What do you have to
say for youself?
Backstab:  Three words.  Go to Hell.
Inferno:  Brave.  Brave but stupid.  *levels the flame thrower to
Backstab's face*  Say goodbye to your friend here.

*Camera angle shifts to show another Blue Spy.  He's clinging to the
bars, apparently trying to break through*

Backstab:  BackAttack...avenge me....
Inferno:  No no no, you've got it all wrong.  *quickly turns around
towards the other Spy, BackAttack, and pulls the trigger.  The other spy
screams in pain, and after a few seconds, falls to the ground, nothing
more than a blackened, deformed corpse*
Backstab:  NO!!  BACKATTACK!!!!

*Inferno begins laughing manically.  Fade out.  Fade in on Backstab.  He
shakes his head to clear it, and notices that Snipe's still talking*

Snipe:  ...And they're inside the base...  We're coming in there to
help.  Over.
Backstab:  Right.  *flips the walky off, and places it back inside his
coat*  Let's rock.  *pulls a gas grenade out of the same part of his
coat, pulls the pin, and tosses it at the entrance, then repeats.  he
moves to the other side of the room, quickly, and tosses two more at
that entrance*

*BadBoy, Breaker, and Missle-d enter, and immideately start choking.
Breaker drops over in a heap, opening a recently suffered bullet wound*

BadBoy:  Wuss!  *kicks Breaker, and walks by*  PARTY TIME!!!

*The others enter behind the HWguy.  All Hell breaks loose.  The
attackers are kept to the lower floor, which gives them a seriously
disadvantage.  Bioman, the Medic, and Demolitious are both killed
quickly.  Backstab runs into the ressuply for more gas grenades*

Bubba:  Ha ha ha!  Nice try!  *tosses a Mirv into the chaos below*
Missle-d:  I don't THINK so!  *fires a rocket at the Mirv, which
detonates in midair.  A couple grenades hit the upper deck, and Techy is
blown up*
Snip:  Oh my god!  They killed Techy!
Snipe:  *blowing the head off the enemy Engineer, Overload*  You
BASTARDS!

*An explosion from behind.  All the fighting stops, and everyone turns.
Inferno enters, rocket launcher in one hand, Backstab, unconcious, and
still holding his nail gun an a near lifeless hand,  in the other*

Inferno:  Good day.  *fires a rocket at Mario, who is flung into the
melee*
Backstab:  *barely audible*  No....BackAttack....no....
Inferno:  Good to know that he remembers his friends.  *shoves the gun
up to Backstab's head*  Let us have what we're after, and I'll let the
Spy live.
Snip:  *to Snipe*  I can make the shot...
Snipe:  *to Snip*  No, don't risk it...
Backstab:  *becoming more audible and clear*  Must...defeat...Inferno!!
*fires his nailgun into Inferno's side.  He howls in pain and fires a
rocket at Backstab's head.  He pulls out of the way in time, and tosses
a hand grenade at Inferno.  It detonates, flinging both of them back
against the walls*
Snipe:  NOW!!

*Both snipers fire at Inferno.  One bullet tears his arm off, the other
simply plunges into his chest.  The Pyro raises his head to them a bit,
tries to lift the launcher, fails, slides his head back, and dies.  The
entire place is perfectly quiet*

Backstab:  *in almost as bad of condition*  He's....he's...dead...

*A roar starts in BadBoy's throat, and he begins firing up at his
enemies.  The Red team follows suit, and presses up, past the
barricade.  Snip screams as a rocket crashes into his legs, severing
them, and flinging his corpse into the ground.  Mario valiantly drops a
det pack, then pulls back, dropping grenades.  Missle-d notices it and
go up the other ramp, but BadBoy is too slow, and it blown to
smithereens*

Missle-d:  ...I'm the only one left.
Snipe:  You killed Snip.
Missle-d:  And now, you!!  *tries to fire a rocket, but it clicks. He
checks.  No ammo*
Snipe:  It's over.  *dramatically raises the little red sighter to
Missle-d's head, and fires.  His body remains standing upright for a
second, then falls to it's knees, and then hits the ground completely.
The head hits the ground below about the same time, with a splat*
Bubba:  We're DocGibs?
DocGibs:  *is standing over Backstab, his healing kit open*  Here.  And
with a plan.
Mario:  What-a kind of plan-a?
DocGibs:  We've got a spy.  It's time to hit them where it hurts.  I'll
work on reviving everyone else.  Backstab, get ready to sneak into their
base.
Backstab:  You sure you can keep shop while I'm gone.
DocGibs:  *smiles* Yeah, I think so.
Backstab:  Then it's time to make sure Inferno stays dead.

*Fade out to black.  Cue title music.  Words, "To Be Continued" appear
on the screen.  Roll credits*